8 Tips to Dealing with a Breakup

To love and connect with someone is one of the most profound experiences we can have. But with that deep connection comes vulnerability. When we open our heart and mind to another person, we take the risk of facing disappointment, pain, or loss. A breakup or relationship breakdown can leave us feeling crushed where we question our worth and are unsure how to move forward. 

It’s important to remember that relationships naturally evolve and not all are meant to last forever. People change and grow — sometimes outgrowing one another. Breakups are an inevitable part of life and do not define your worth. Recognising when a relationship has become unhealthy or is stopping us from living the life we want to live is critical for helping us move forward. 

While rejection is a widely shared human experience — one that almost all of us face at some point — it often means we can turn to blame as an early reaction. That can often make us feel worse and add to the psychological and physical impacts a breakup can have on us. 

Common emotional reactions to a breakup

• Feeling betrayed
• Feeling rejected
• Feeling deeply sad
• Anxiety
• Depression
• Low self-esteem
• Physical pain
• Headaches
• Fatigue
• More stressed than usual

No matter how long or short the relationship lasted, the end of a relationship marks a significant transition, and healing takes time and self compassion. Learning how to let go or navigating the separation in a collaborative way can be a step forward to new growth and future opportunities.

How can you recover, rebuild, and rediscover yourself after a breakup?

1. Let yourself grieve

The first step in recovering from a breakup is letting ourselves feel. Grieving is a necessary part of the healing process so suppressing our emotions can often have the opposite effect in the long run. We need to give ourselves permission to cry, talk about it with friends, or write our feelings down in a journal. Acknowledging the loss is crucial to moving forward.

2. Remember that healing takes time

There’s no set timeline for how long it takes to heal from a breakup. Accepting that recovery is a gradual process and that we won’t feel better right away is critical. Trying to rush our healing can often lead to suppressing emotions, which may resurface later. Be patient—we all have good days followed by tough ones, and that’s normal.

3. Establish healthy boundaries

One of the hardest parts of a breakup is creating emotional and physical distance. While it might be tempting to stay in contact with our ex, it’s important to give ourselves the space to heal. Set boundaries with them. This can look like taking a break from communication or limiting how often we interact with them. Social media can also be a source of pain, so consider unfollowing or muting them for a while to avoid being reminded of the relationship.

4. Don’t be afraid to ask for support

Breakups can feel isolating, but it’s important to remember that we don’t have to go through it alone. Reaching out to friends, family, or a psychologist to share our thoughts and feelings can help us gain perspective and provide comfort and reassurance. The best people we can surround ourselves with are those that accept us as we are, without judgement.

5. Focus on yourself

In the aftermath of a breakup, self-care becomes more important than ever. It’s now that we need to prioritise our physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Engaging in activities that make us feel good — like exercising, meditating, or pursuing hobbies — nourishing our bodies with healthy food, and getting enough rest can really help. This can help us regain strength and confidence, and give us the energy and capacity to process the range of emotions that we may be feeling.

6. Rediscover who you are

After a relationship, it’s easy to lose sight of who we are as individuals. A breakup offers an opportunity to reconnect with ourselves and our interests. Take time to explore what makes you happy outside of the relationship. Whether it’s picking up a new hobby, travelling, or pursuing a career goal, rediscovering our passions and exploring our values can be an empowering way to regain a sense of purpose.

7. Take time to reflect

There’s a time where we will be in a more emotionally stable place. Now is the time to reflect on what we learnt from the relationship. Consider what worked, what didn’t, and how you’ve grown as a person. This reflection isn’t about blaming ourselves or the other person, but about gaining insight into what we need and want in future relationships. Understanding these lessons will help us grow and move forward more mindfully.

8. Embrace what lies ahead

As we begin to heal, focusing on the future rather than dwelling on the past is important. Breakups, while painful, give us a fresh start. This is a time to set new goals, both personal and professional, and to work towards becoming the best version of ourselves. Embrace the unknown with an open mind and know that this chapter of life holds new possibilities and experiences. There are many healthy and fulfilling relationships out there, each offering the potential for deep connection and growth when the time is right. Embrace the unknown with an open mind and know that this chapter of life holds new possibilities and experiences.

Healing after a breakup is a deeply personal journey

It is important to remember that change and transition can be challenging. Be gentle with yourself and stay attuned to your own needs. Avoid comparing your healing process to others or falling into the trap of “should” thinking. Embrace your unique path, trusting that your emotions, your own pace and your experiences are valid.

Are you struggling with a breakup and want to talk to someone? We’re here for you. 

Reach out to our friendly team today.

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